Russell Brand, the strangest comedian this country has produced in years, shocked great swathes of the US when he hosted the MTV awards last night. Now, this is a guy who, when he preformed in Northampton this spring, had to make a public apology after calling the Police live on stage and claiming to know who the local man was who had attacked and raped two women just the week before. So you can imagine just how much fun he had in the States, live on National television.
He started out by saying
“I’m famous in the United Kingdom. My persona don’t really work without fame. Without fame, this haircut could be mistaken for mental illness.”
And if you’ve seen his hair, you’d know he was right. He followed that up by saying
“Please, America, elect Barack Obama. On behalf of the world. I know some people, I think they’re called Racists, say that America isn’t ready to elect a Black man. But I know you’re a forward thinking county because you allowed a retarded Cowboy be President for last 8 years. In Britain, that man wouldn’t be trusted with a pair of scissors.”
On Sarah Palin’s daughter and the young man who knocked her up he said,
“That is the safe sex message of all time. Use a condom or become a Republican!”
And he ripped into The Jonas Brothers, a band I’ll confess I’d never heard of until today. They wear “promise rings” to signify they don’t want in engage in pre-marital sex. Russell Brand is a self-confessed former sex addict who still gets more than his fair share, so you can imagine the sort of things he said about them. Yet, strangely enough, his piss-taking of these ‘Fine Christian Boys’ is the one thing he was made to apologise for. I wonder what that says about the host country?
Now, don’t get me wrong, I think that promising not to ‘do it’ before you get married is all well and good if that’s what you want to do. And let’s be honest, in Britain we have the highest rate of teenage pregnancy in western Europe so we are hardly in a position to judge. But what I find strange the need to ram the fact that that’s what you’re doing down everyone’s throat. I mean, the phrase “He doth protest too much” comes to mind. After all, Britney Spears spent years telling us she was a virgin, but some would say she was just trying to hide the fact that she was nothing more than a trailer-park slut.
And another thing. If you’re going to promise to stay a virgin no matter what, isn’t ‘pop-star’ an odd career choice. They’re not exactly renowned for their celibate ways, are they? It must be really hard for those boys to keep it in their pants when sexy young women (and some not so sexy) are pelting them with their pants every-night on stage.
You know, the Take That boys were said to be virginal and waiting for the right woman at the height of their fame. Turns out later that they confessed to having girls sneaked into their rooms after shows and were basically shagging everything that moved. I’m not saying that these Jonas Brothers are doing the same – but I do wonder when we’ll get the first paternity claim.
As for Russell Brand. Quite honestly, you can keep him. I hope he builds a big career in the States. ‘Cause at least then he’ll be kept off our screens and radiowaves over here. I’ve never really liked the bloke to be honest.